Archive for October 2006

Desperate Times call for Desperate Ads

October 31, 2006


Basty and the Major don’t see eye to eye

October 31, 2006


Did Basty send this e-card to the New York police when they finished questioning him?

if we knew then what we know now

October 31, 2006


Denver doesn’t get enough pressure from their front 4 to beat Indianapolis.

The only team in the AFC that could give Indy a run is San Diego, whose 3-4 can best mimic the Steelers and Patriots approach against Payton in year’s past. If only someone could liberate Mary Schottenheimer from Marty Schottenheimer by January.

It’s good to see Shawn Merriman get as many sacks as possible before the steroids fully leave his system.

Carolina’s defense is living off of reputation alone. They miss Dan Morgan.

If the Falcons can get John Abraham healthy, they’ll be dangerous come January.

The move to Tony Romo was really the only decision Parcells could have made. The Cowboys have no left tackle and Bledsoe can’t throw while under pressure. It may backfire but if Romo develops it might make the Cowboys the Super-Bowl favorites (Sorry Chicago) out of a weak NFC.

Byron Leftwich shouldn’t start again this year for Jacksonville unless David Garrard gets hurt. Garrard can get you a few extra points a game with his mobility and those three to six extra points are a huge margin for Jacksonville.

Cincinnati still has no defense. No defense means no wins in the playoffs.

Damon Huard might be the most unbelievable story of 2006. He hadn’t taken a snap in six years and how has the Chiefs back in contention.

What happened to Seattle’s defense? Julian Peterson is playing well. They returned nearly everybody else. And now they can’t stop anyone. We welcome explanations.

Al Michaels & John Madden reported last night that Tony Romo got dumped by his girlfriend last week after the loss to the Giants. Note to Woman: Reconsider.

at least he doesn’t speak aramaic

October 30, 2006

We always assumed from how he comported himself both inside and outside the squared circle that Kane aka The Big Red Machine believed in low taxes, reduced spending and a vigorous approach to the war on terror. And now we have this video confirming our hunch.

He certainly makes Mike Sweeney seem like an even more credible voice of reason (as if that were even possible).

We’re thinking of you too

October 30, 2006


Sad news out of Milwaukee. Ha Seung Jin has been waived.

Let’s hope he lands with a new team by Christmas time so he can be featured on some new e-cards.

bedding barry manillow would really make it a holy trinity

October 30, 2006


The Chicago Sun-Times has an in-depth profile on a woman who has had intercourse with both Brian Ulracher of the Chicago Bears & Michael Flatley of Lord of the Riverdance. The photo above is of her describing Ulracher’s genitals.

As for Urlacher, Robertson met him at a Chicago nightclub, where they hit it off and talked all night long. “He was nervous and shy and everything. Mr. Suave he’s not,” she said.They dated for a bit, but Robertson had her eye on someone else.

“I told Brian to kick rocks,” she said. “Then I found out I was pregnant.”

Robertson said when she broke the news to Urlacher, he asked her to have an abortion. When she refused, Urlacher asked her to move out of state, according to a court filing that includes a series of text messages that Urlacher — who has two daughters — allegedly sent to Robertson.

One message allegedly sent on Nov. 10, 2004, reads: “UR right I don’t want anymore kids and its 2 bad U want 2 bring a child into this situation when it could B avoided,” court records show.

where was anthony mason during all of this?

October 29, 2006


The New York Post reported today about Patrick Ewing testifying in a New York courtroom against a man suspected of robbing his home.

The article makes no mention of whether or not the batliff needed to mop the down the sweat in the witness box after Ewing’s testimony.