Archive for December 2006

they feel like synthetic basketballs

December 30, 2006

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Big ups to Media Take Out for this excellent story on Siovaughn Wade’s titties.

But realistically, unless his wife has the passion of the Jackie Christie, this won’t be enough to hold down DWade. When you are the best player in the league, you need to play/pay the field. We can only hope that Wade exercises better judgement and has less “taste level issues” then Michael Jordan (it being the 80s is no excuse, MJ).

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blow-out

December 29, 2006

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Now that Mike Fratello has been canned by the Memphis Grizzlies, can we possibly get Fratello and Platinum Blond Doug Collins together in the same broadcast booth? That would certainly be the pinnacle of bad hair in sports broadcasting, Fratello with the worst toupee ever and Collins with the worst dye job on planet earth (besides Superstar Bob Holly). Imagine Marv Albert in the middle of that pairing! Hibachi

giving credit where credit is due

December 27, 2006

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We never thought we’d write this but Isiah was right. Greg Anthony does in fact have shit for brains. He recently wrote on ESPN.com that he would pick Kobe over Wade because Kobe possesses a superior killer instinct. What? Questioning Dwade’s killer instinct is like doubting Patrick Ewing’s penile endowment.

Did Mr. Fuji throw salt in Anthony’s eyes during last year’s playoffs? Is he confusing a killer instinct on the basketball court with a killer instinct in an Aspen hotel room. Last time I checked DWade carried his team to the championship and dominated forth quarters like no player since MJ, while Kobe shot only three times in the second half of last year’s Game Seven loss to Phoenix.

We appreciate the effortlessness that Kobe plays with and that his game has evolved over time, but let’s not tear down Dwade to boost up Number 24. And let’s hope in the future that Anthony thinks before he speaks so that we don’t conclude that Larry Johnson was the brains of the UNLV basketball team.

Merry Christmas

December 26, 2006

‘Nuff said.

will his mom like denver?

December 24, 2006

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The MJD doesn’t seem to like AI’s new threads:

It just really struck me to turn on the television and see Allen Iverson, who we’re so used to seeing in black with red trim, appropriate colors for a cat so hard, wearing a soft baby blue, the color you use to decorate an infant’s crib. It was like seeing Malcom X in a tight Aeropostale t-shirt.

MJD should stick to being the voice of the innocent and leave the fashion critique to us.

AI looks severe in his new colors. Harder. Scarier. Like he’s on the inside. He’s now a gangster with a badge.

mark eaton’s dancing moves

December 23, 2006

Here’s a member of the Utah Jazz who won’t be able to take advantage of his free pass

putz

December 21, 2006

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The real loser out of this whole Philadelphia-Denver trade was Kevin Garnett, who is saddled with the biggest idiot west of New York in Minnesota TimberWolves General Manager Kevin McHale. If you are to believe reports from around the league, the Timberwolves refused to give up Rookie Randy Foye as part of a deal to get Iverson.

Mr. McHale, let’s for a moment put aside the fact that in 10 years you haven’t put a good team around Kevin Garnett. And let us also put aside for a moment that you are blessed that KG hasn’t demanded a trade already and has the patience of a Buddhist monk

If you really think Randy Foye will be a special player and make a great combo with KG, so much so that you don’t want to move him for an all-star, fine, we can perhaps buy that. Then for God’s sake why are you only playing Randy Foye an average of fifteen minutes a game. Play the fucking kid so at the end of the season you can better assess the team’s talent level. And if your coach Dwayne Casey won’t play Randy Foye, then fire him. Please go embarass yourself on the sidelines like Isiah. At least fans can watch the emperor of the Knicks be without clothes and have to roll around in the pile of shit he created while your Lurch ass hides in some luxury suite, having ruined the careers of one of the best basketball players of this era.